Rewind, let's try again

I had a strange nightmare last night.

I was in some sort of old house, and there were antique things that I was playing with. They were family things that I was being silly and disrespectful with and I knew it was wrong but I did it anyway. Whoever I was with told me that it was a bad idea and I'd incur some sort of wrath for it but I think I wanted to. I wanted to see what would happen.

So as I danced around a pole wiping something through my hair, the ghost of my great grandmother appeared. She looked exactly like she did when I'd last seen her too, but with a cane.

"Great grandma!" I shouted, but it was low and garbled as it came out.

And then the dream froze. Somewhere in my head I could tell that what was supposed to happen, didn't.

So things backed up like a video rewind and ran again. Around the pole, dance, wipe, great grandma...and I shouted again, the same way.

And this time, S woke me up. "You're having a bad dream."

That, I knew, was the "correct" ending. The one I'd been waiting for the first time...

The Sailboat

I was in a cavern, a big one, well lit, but it was night time since I could see the sky through cracks and it was dark and full of stars. The walls were of some whitish stone, all craggy and jagged, and there was a river that ran through the cavern. A line up of people waited to see two sets of people at the mouth of the cavern. It was sort of like the line up for Santa at the mall.

The one at the mouth of the cavern ws dressed in some sort of a purple wizard's robe with ermine trim. And the other one was sitting on a two masted sailboat which bobbed at anchor in the river. My turn was coming and I wanted the boat guy but figured I'd get the other one.

But no! I got the boat. So I sent my eldest son, A, on first. He went on, and the man on the boat was sitting in a library on the deck. He was in the open air, but surrounded by books and book shelves, and his seat was a leather wing chair. A went on and the man asked A what his dream was.

"A skateboard," was A's reply. The man, and I and everyone gathered near me chuckled.

"No, sweetie," I called. "He means bigger than that. Your dream."

Before A could answer though, a boy, who was the son of the boatman, called down to A from a window up high above (in the rock maybe?) that A should go play with him. He did, and then I was aboard. And I was staying with the man and his wife and child, a guest on their ship for a voyage of some sort, on this magical sailboat.

Passing on

There was a dream a few days ago, three or so, I think...and in that dream, I was dying. I knew I was dying, and that it'd be only a couple of days until it happened. I wasn't really sad or upset at the idea, but I really really wanted to talk to E, to tell her I was going and that it was okay, but that I really really missed her. There wouldn't be time to see her before it happened, but then I said to myself "why? why does it need to be two days? not like it'll be congestive heart failure or something...."

Then last night, this morning really, I was dreaming about someone coming to the door. I went outside to meet them, and we were in my Dad's garage. They were guys I knew who'd been by before and were back again to fix up the garage. They were really going to spruce it up. I opened the garage door and we were talking about all the wonderful things they were going to do. Then we were in the backyard, still at Dad's, and they were looking at the lawn. They found a trap door, but I didn't know how it could be there. "I dug there as a kid, it's impossible" I said. They opened the wooden door and it turned out to really be a deck! It was broken and needed repair, but it was doing stable enough to stand on and looked like it'd actually be really nice when it was done.

They're both very "change" related...changes, decisions, all that... It feels like a time of change to me, I know that for sure.